My Weight loss journey

My name is Kim.. and I'm morbidly obese.  I've run the gamut of overweight, to obese, and finally to morbidly obese for most of my life.  In just the last 6 months, I've gained 45 lbs. HOW?!  Well, that's actually fairly easy to explain.  I don't move.  I have a sedentary job where I stuff my mouth with sugar, carbs, soda, with an occasional leaf of lettuce for lunch.
I was just looking at a picture of me in a swimsuit.. and I just couldn't even look at myself.  I dream of being a smaller, manageable hundred-something.  One-derland.  I'd be happy with low 200's.  As mentioned though.. that is just a dream right now.  This morning I weighed in at 389 lbs. I'd been maintaining a slightly less hefty 340-350 for quite some time.  I haven't been this large since I was 9 months pregnant with both of my children.
Don't get me wrong, I've tried dieting.  I'll survive a few days, sometimes a week.. at my longest streth, it was 4 months and I got down to 330 lbs. However, I always inevitably end up falling off my wagon, into a big comfy vat of sugar and balloon back up again.

At this point in my life, I am 31 yrs old.  I have 2 small children.  I have a wonderful handsome husband.  I can't stand myself.  I want to be able to play with my children outside: ride bikes, kick a ball, throw a ball, go for a walk without getting winded or walking at a snails pace. I want to RUN!  But I'm stuck in this body, and I don't know what to do with it.

Today, I've started thinking again. If I can lose just 2 lbs per week for the next year.. I could be down under 300 lbs by this time next year. I could actually buy pants in a real store instead of ordering 34w pants from a website, just to get them in the mail and STILL not fit. SOOOOO.. as an incentive (and this is where the store employee discount comes in handy) I'm going to buy myself a  swimsuit for next summer.. in a size 26w.  One way or another, I'm determined to be able to fit in it!

Where do I begin?  My first step: eliminating the worst offenders.  I've downed 2-3  20oz bottles of Pepsi just about every day for a year.  Today is my 2nd day of no soda.  So far so good.  Water is - eh- ok.  Ice water.. better.  I have to work on the candy:  managed to eat a whole bag of Rolo's by myself this morning, within 5 hours. YIKES!  1520 calores!  that's a whole day's allotment!

So tomorrow: No Soda.  No Candy.  I can do this.

My next step (quite literally): moving!  Today, in the spur of the moment, I went for a walk during my lunch.  1 mile in 25 minutes.  My legs feel like jello, I'm wheezing up a storm, and I'm red and sweaty.. but dangitall.. I walked it!  My goal by August: walk up 2-3 flights of stairs at a time.  Lucky for me, I work 7 floors up, so I can definitely work on that goal.  I also want to do an obese-persons version of Couch to 5k.  At the very least, I want to run for 1 minute at a time come September! But baby steps :-)

To keep myself accountable, I'll come on here daily and update my food and activity.  I'll weigh in weekly on Monday mornings.  I hope this works.  Keep your fingers crossed for me!

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